It started as a simple idea in my head one Sunday afternoon. I had been taking french lessons for one year and could read and write french pretty well but I was terrible at speaking (still am) the language. I also had a notion of moving to France. From that Sunday afternoon…LOOK at what we have created. Welcome to French Soiree.com

…and I do mean “WE.” WE have met every Thursday for 52 weeks. Through rain, snow, heat waves, holidays and transit strikes…whether we numbered 30 or 3, we continued to meet. Our email distribution list numbers 350 ACTIVE opt-in participants, and NOW we have our own web site! This could not have happened without YOU. Because of you, our membership has swelled, and a lot of deep sincere friendships have been formed.

So…. a little history. I was out of a long-term relationship…you could say that I had been married (not formally) and subsequently divorced. I had a lot of time on my hands, and work was not fulfilling. The only thing that was fun at that time was my weekly french lesson. So, since I have always had the desire to live and work in another country (I’ve come very close twice) and I had nothing to hold me back, I made a plan to move to France. I also decided to re-enter the dating pool. Quite frankly, I was not interested in dating per se, but I wanted to meet real cool people and build a social network.

I did the on-line thing for some time and ABSOLUTELY HATED IT! I found out that people were not interested in just meeting people. There were always some ulterior motive. I also hated the fact that many people required a picture first before they would grant you an audience. I found this very distasteful since I felt that I was immediately being judged upon my image opposed to my personality. That is something that goes very much against my grain. I believe everyone can bring something to table besides their appearance.

Thus, after tiring of the nuts…I thought; “Why not create a french conversation group where people can meet face to face, get to know each other and let things develop from there!”

People have asked me; “Why did you want the group comprised of gay and bi-sexual men?” There are, I guess, three reasons; First (and I HATE labels) I can’t say that I am gay BUT I can’t say that I’m straight either! Having been a professional singer and then a stripper (many moons ago–I just love the stage!), I have had the priviledge of meeting some VERY dynamic men and women in the creative arts/entertainment fields. Since I deal with “suit & ties” all day and crunch numbers, I wanted to have that “comfortable” atmosphere…that creative spirit, wild type of vibe. Second, it seemed as if there were no alternative venues for men to just really meet outside of the “bar atmosphere”, or one geared towards sexual hook-ups. Third, (from a marketing perspective), “If the boys love it…the rest will follow!” …and that is exactly what has happened! We have everybody now. I now call this group “The wicked & the weird.” Good stuff!

How did we find Au Coin Du Feu? Well, some woman who calls herself Susan Anton (really!) placed an ad on Craigs List stating that her husband has a french restaurant that has some dead time, and would a french language group like to meet there. GREAT! We now had a place to meet. The rest is history! To this day I have yet to meet this Susan Anton. I for one do not believe that she exist. I mean…really… Susan Anton?

So, how did I cull our membership? Well, I wanted people like myself. One who wears the suits & ties during the day, and is prim & proper BUT who wears the leather & chains at night. You know, the deviants! (I’ll have you know that I attend church service most Sundays and I sing a mean Amazing Grace! ) …Anyway, what better place to find the fun and the freakish–Craigs List! Since that time, word of mouth and other marketing has gotten our name out there! We are now, and have always been, a great group of people!

The memories of the year…. the one & two o’clock mornings, the dancing on the tables, the leather g-string on and on! All done in good CLEAN fun!

Now, we move to our next level. Our web-site.

Our web site will help us. This was created for you–not me. Its a place for you to shine, to display your work, to develop clients, to develop a following. Many people have been discovered from web sites. Matt Drudge and Kevin Sites come to mind. It is also a place for everyone. We will have news, weather, resources etc… So get ready…its only going to get better!

Then we will sell it and have a HUGE party ….. : )

Happy Anniversary French Soiree! There is more fun to come! As I always say, “If you come once…you will come again! I Promise!”

G

Happy Monday, everyone! I hope each of you had a great holiday, as I was fortunate to be able to enjoy a 4-day weekend, and gorge myself on ham (no turkey this year) and stuffing, gravy and cherry pie.

I always seem to make my analogies based on sports, as that was how I learned a lot about life’s lessons. Playing baseball, tennis, football and basketball from childhood on, I learned about taking calculated risks. If something works time and again, it will likely work once more. Maybe not the next time, because we need some variation, but when you need that one extra step, go back to what works.

My beef is about the 49ers, the San Francisco football team, who lost on Sunday because the coach played scared - having more confidence in the other team’s defense than in his own offense. His rushing attack was moving the ball on their last drive. The Rams could do nothing to stop them.

So there they are: 4th down and literally 2 inches to go, inside the 5 yard-line, up by 1 point. There is under 4 minutes left in the game, and if they get a 1st down and go in for the touchdown, a victory is essentially assured, as they would be ahead by 8 points, assuming the PAT.

Instead, the defense-minded coach decides to play it safe, and kick a field goal, going up by 4 points. This meant the Rams would need to score a touchdown in the waning minutes to secure a victory. It also showed he believed more in the Rams’ ability to stop his offense, than in his offense to move the ball 2 inches.

My point here is two-fold: When you come to a fork in the road there are choices. Play it safe and wonder what-if? Or, if the risk is calculated, and what you need to get done has worked repeatedly, why not take that risk and enjoy the rewards that will likely follow?

Of course there is the possibility for failure, but when you are not risking the grocery money on a dice roll, why not go for it? This website or most others that we visit on a regular basis would not be here if not for some sort of risk. As Steve Winwood once said, “While you see a chance, take it!”

P.S. A hearty congratulations to Bob in Dallas who wrote that he was able to celebrate Thanksgiving wholeheartedly this year after landing a new job after being out of work for 6 months! Bob said that being 62 years old made it tough, but he never stopped in his pursuit. Awesome, and thanks for sharing!

A place for gay travelers to find out about trips that support their community. Take your trip and let us donate 30% back to the gay cause of your choice.

Let us know what gay community charities interest you and we will make sure they are included on our charity list.

Please join us and let us know what you think of this idea.

Someone who posted a blog a few days back stole my thunder regarding Thanksgiving. While I may not be having most rewarding year money-wise, that doesn’t mean that I can’t help someone or some family that may be having a tough time this holiday season.

Every year, regardless of how well I may have done the preceding 10 months, I try to go grocery shopping and make a trip to St. Anthony’s or Glide Memorial in San Francisco and drop off a bunch of food that can either be used in their daily free meals or put together as a grocery bag for a family.

I would tend to think that most cities have some similar program, and for the change in your car’s ashtray plus a few more bucks you can really make a difference.

I encourage you to make a difference and request those in your network, either here or in your neighborhood. As a song by Arrested Development said last decade, “two dollars means a snack to me, but it means a big deal to you.”

Once upon a time I was a happy, healthy person who was surrounded by wonderful friends. 20 years later I find myself completely alone, unable and afraid to connect with other people, and becoming increasingly bitter and resentful.

I have a chemical imbalance that has left me prone to clinical depressive episodes. This current extremely low mood that I am in happened as the result of a very difficult employment situation. I pissed off my supervisor because I had challenged the status quo of the department. Specifically, there were illegal things going on in the department–things that could lead to the death or injury of hospital patients. I raised concerns about these issues, first to my supervisor and then to an outside department. The illegal activities were discovered and immediately addressed. But as a result, my supervisor rode me so hard that I eventually had an emotional break down. I ended up in a psychiatric hospital. She fired me the day I was discharged from the unit. That was nearly a month and half ago. People who were friendly to me where I used to work now won’t even return an email. There is this guy, Tim Chamberlain, who I worked with… I sent him an email and he responded “Tom, do not ever attempt to contact again.” I hadn’t done anything to him. But that old queen just thought he’d take the opportunity to be petty and bitchy. I hope he reads this and realizes that his words were very, very hurtful–that if his intentions were to make me feel awful and hate myself, then he succeeded. I don’t know why there are truly hateful people out there who get joy out of intentionally hurting others. And to think that he’s a “helping professional” who is supposed to be above such behavior.

Anybody who reads this must think, “why don’t you get a lawyer? they can’t fire you over this.” Do you know how difficult it is to find an attorney? Every one of them is interested in one thing–money. That’s all. They either want a huge retainer ($10,000 or higher), or they brush you off by saying, “according to what you say and the records you have, you would have a pretty strong case, but the pay-off in the end isn’t really worth the effort that our firm would put into it.”

I would love to have my job back. I have filed complaints with several state and federal programs. They only take your case if you have proof that illegal activity occurred–which I do have. Even so, these programs are highly bureaucratic and take months before you see any results.

In the mean time I cannot stop thinking that maybe it’s time for me to just end things. Maybe my time on earth has come to an end and I should just take myself out of it. I’ve promised myself that I won’t kill myself–but I can’t help thinking that it is the only solution to this problem.

I spend day after day alone and afraid to go out and meet other people. Thank God I have one friend who is really helpful and supportive. My family, largely, likes to point out that my problems are the result of my “evil lifestyle” (i.e. being gay) and don’t want to become involved.

On the upside, I have recently discovered an hilarious persona, Betty Butterfield (go to Google video and search for her). She is hysterical and I’ve been able to divert a lot of my sadness and depression by watching her little clips over and over.

Well, that’s part of my story. I’ll add more later…

I’ll bet a lot of you are like me and grew up in a regular American middle-class home, and were fortunate to have a worry-free turkey dinner.

As I got a bit older the TV stations would always broadcast from St Anthony’s Dining Room in San Fran’s Tenderloin District and show folks who are down on their luck having a feast. It always made me feel a bit guilty having so much.

I realized I shouldn’t feel guilty, but to help if I could. So, if you can help here in SF or where you are with your time to help serve meals or donate some food - even some canned goods that have been collecting dust on your shelf will be a welcome gift.

ART AND SCIENCE FEED THE MIND AND EMOTIONS,JUST AS FOOD FEEDS THE PHYSICAL BODY.TO BE HEALTHY A PERSON MUST BE CAREFUL OF THE QUALITY AND DIGESTIBILITY OF HIS MENTAL-EMOTIONAL FOOD AS HE IS ABOUT PHYSICAL FOOD. POISONOUS IDEAS AND NEGATIVE EMOTIONS POISON THE INNER BODYAND CREATE PSYCHIC AND PHYSICAL DEFECTS. UNHEALTHY PEOPLE CANNOT CREATE A HEALTHY SOCIETY. ALL THAT IS VICIOUS AND VILE IN ART, ALL THAT DEGRADES AND DISTORT THE MINDS AND EMOTIONS OF THE MASSES IS RELATIVELY DANGEROUS AND DESPICABLE

DEVELOPMENT OF ESP

THE DEVELOPMENT OF E.S.P. OF COURSE ,IF YOU RE NOT GIFTED WITH IT,WILL NOT HAPPEN OVERNIGHT. BUT WE CAN BEGIN NOW TO RE-ORIENT OUR CONSCIOUNESS TO THE DYNAMICS OF THE ENERGY PROCESSED UNIVERSE, AND LOVE MUST BE ITS MANIFESTATION. ASIDE FROM BEING EMBODIMENTS OF LOVE,WE MUST CONTINUALLY PRAY TO GOD THAT WE BE GIVEN SUCH POWER TO GUIDE AND BENEFIT MANKIND, AS PROMISED IN THE SCRIPTURES: JOEL 2:28 (ACT2:17)

“AND IT SHALL COME TO PASS AFTERWARD THA I WILL POUR OUT MY SPIRIT UPON ALL FLESH AND YOUR SONS AND YOUR DAUGHTERS SHALL PROPHECY, YOUR OLD MEN SHALL DREAM DREAMS AND YOUR YOUNG MEN SHALL SEE VISIONS”

POSITIVE IMPLICATIONS OF E.S.P.

WHEN PEOPLE DEVELOP THEIR HIGHEST MIND, INSOLUBLE PROBLEMS THAT TAXED THE OLD SOCIETIES WILL NOT ONLY BECOME MEANINGLESS AND IRRELEVANT, THEY WOULD JUST DISAPPEAR. WHEN A GOOD PORTION OF THE PEOPLE BECOME SKILLED IN THE USE OF THEIR PSYCHIC TALENT LIKE CLAIREVOYANCE, PRECOGNITION, DREAM INTERPRETATION PSYCHIC VIBRATIONS, PSYCHOMETRY, AND AURA READING ,MOST CRIMES WILL DISAPPEAR .WHO IS GOING TO RAPE ,ROB, OR KILL WHEN DETECTING THEIR IDENTITY AND APPREHENDING THEM IS ALMOST A CERTAINTY BY DETECTIVES WHO ARE PSYCHIC? HOLDING AN ARTICLE OF CLOTHING, OR A PORTRAIT, A PSYCHIC EXPERT CAN TRACT DOWN THE CRIMINAL IN AN PART OF THE WORLD! WHO IS GOING TO WRITE PHONY CHECKS WHEN ANY TRAINED PERSON CAN JUST TOUCH AND SPOT IT IMMEDIATELY ? OUR JUSTICE PROBLEMS (CASE OVERLOADS, SLOW COURTROOM PROCEDURES ETC.) WILL ALSO BE SOLVED BY HIRING PSYCHIC JUDGES LIKE THE PRIESTS OF ANCIENT TEMPLES TRAINED SEERS, AND DEVINERS OF ANCIENT EGYPT,THE CIVILIZATION THAT PRODUCED THE PYRAMIDS. THEY COULD SENSE WETHER A CRIMINAL WAS CAPABLE OF REHABILITATION. IF A CRIMINAL IS NOT CAPABLE OF REHAB THEN HE OR SHE SHOULD BE SENT TO A DIFFERENT KIND OF INSTITUTION DESIGNED TO KEEP HIM OR HER OUT OF SOCIETY’S WAY

THE RELEVANCE OF E.S.P. IN MODERN SOCIETY

AS MORE AND MORE PEOPLE BECOME PROFECIENT AND EXPERT IN THE USE OF THEIR PSYCHIC POWER, ONE CAN NOT HELP WONDERING WHAT THE IMPLICATIONS ARE FOR SOCIETY AS A WHOLE. THE DEVELOPMENT OF PSYCHIC FACULTIES FAR TRASCENDS THE IMPORTANCE OF ANY MERE TECHNOLOGICAL BREAKTHROUGH. FOR HERE WE HAVE A BREAKTHROUGH IN THE EVOLUTION OF MEN.WE HAVE ALL SEEN WHAT AN ADVANCE SUCH AS THE DISCOVERY OF STEAM ENGINE BROUGHT TO CIVILIZATION. IT GAVE BIRTH TO THE INDUSTRIAL REVOLUTION AND COMPLETELY TRANSFORMED SOCIETY. BUT THE STEAM ENGINE AND OTHER TECHNOLOGICAL ADVANCES WERE MERELY EXTERNAL.THEY WERE EFFECTS OF AN INNER CHANGE IN PEOPLE WHO HAD TRAINED AND DEVELOPED THEIR CREATIVE AND INTUITIVE IMAGINATION AND INTELLECT